In the past, we wouldn’t have turned from it. We would’ve allowed it to steal our joy and pull our hearts away from each other. I praise God we can now recognize it and stop ourselves. And the reason we’re able to is because we have Jesus’ peace.
Jesus left us His peace so we would be able to remain calm in every situation. John 14:27 says, “Peace I leave with you; My [own] peace I now give and bequeath to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. [Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed; and do not permit yourselves to be fearful and intimidated and cowardly and unsettled]” (AMP).
Just because we have Jesus’ peace doesn’t mean we automatically walk in peace. Jesus said to stop allowing ourselves to be agitated. When a situation arises we have a choice of giving in to our flesh or yielding to the Holy Spirit. The more we yield to the Spirit, the stronger Jesus’ peace becomes and the easier it is to walk in peace. The more we give in to our flesh, the stronger our flesh becomes and the harder it is to walk in peace.
For example, when my husband and I are in a disagreement, I have a choice of ending the argument by agreeing to disagree, or continuing the argument by insisting I am right. Every time I argue with my husband I am feeding my flesh and hindering the Holy Spirit from developing His fruit in me. Then when I’m caught off guard by a situation, I don’t have the fruit to prevent me from losing my temper. But if I continue yielding to the Spirit, I will be able to hold my peace even when I’m caught off guard.
The more we allow the Holy Spirit to develop peace in us, the more equipped we will be in trials. We need to be on guard and not allow ourselves to be unsettled even in minor situations.
If we want to enjoy our marriages we have to seek peace and pursue it. The Bible says in 1 Peter 3:8-11, “Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For, “Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech. He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it.”
We seek and pursue peace by striving to live in harmony with our spouses. We should be sympathetic with their weaknesses and compassionate with their struggles. We should bless them when they curse us, and pray for them when they mistreat us. As long as we are doing our part to live in harmony with our spouses, God will work out the rest.
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Jesus walked in peace despite all He endured because His trust was in God and not man. He was able to love those who crucified Him because He knew they were not His real enemy, Satan was.
Our spouses are not our real enemies. Satan uses our weaknesses to provoke us to fight against each other. Galatians 5:15 says, “If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.”
Satan wants “us” to destroy our own marriages. It’s his purpose and plan for us. It’s the reason he deceives us into thinking our spouses are our enemies. He wants us fighting against each other. If we don’t want him to succeed we have to do everything possible to keep our peace.
I have to study peace in the Bible often. I sometimes write verses and post them around my house as reminders to keep my peace. In the past, I have even set a timer several times a day reminding me to stay in peace. I am determined to do what it takes to stay in peace and not give the enemy a foothold into my marriage.
We need to fight for our marriages and not allow the enemy to steal our peace.
In Matthew 8:24, Jesus gave us a perfect example to help us keep our peace: “Without warning, a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping.”
Many times when my husband and I are frustrated, I’ll stop and run into his arms. Stopping for a rest in the middle of a storm, like Jesus did, helps us calm down and keep our peace. Other times, just walking away and asking God to keep me from fighting back helps me keep my peace. Also, regularly asking God to search my heart and rid me of all bitterness, anger, and resentment keeps my heart at peace.
As we discipline ourselves we will see Jesus’ peace growing stronger in us. The stronger it becomes, the stronger impact we’ll have on families as they see we are unmoved by circumstances.
No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
— Hebrews 12:11
I encourage you to give your burdens to God instead of to your spouse. If we can’t carry our own burdens our spouses surely can’t. Strive to keep your peace and live in harmony with your spouse. But don’t beat yourself up when you fall. Continue relying on God to help you walk in peace. He will always be with you.
Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.