Author Amanda Beth
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Nagging Spouse

10/6/2011

4 Comments

 
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I didn’t really share my husband’s faults in my book. I mostly shared my weaknesses and our weaknesses as a couple. Those who have read my book often comment how wonderful my husband sounds and what a crazy wife I was. So I thought I would share one of my husband’s weaknesses. This is not to dishonor him or point out his flaws to make me look better. It's just to encourage others that no one is perfect. We all have weaknesses, no matter how good we are.

My husband is a great husband and father. However, he frequently points out my faults. I admit I used to be a very difficult wife. But God has changed me tremendously through the years. I can honestly say that I get up each day striving to be the wife, mother, and woman God created me to be. I don’t ever purposely try to do wrong as I did in the past.

My husband gets annoyed with the little things that I do or don’t do. For example, it drives my husband crazy when he can’t reach me when he’s at work. Our home phone is connected to our computer. If one of our kids knocks against the computer, the phone disconnects. My cell phone isn’t that loud and I usually can’t hear it over all the noise, especially if it’s not on the same level I am on. My husband told me recently that he wanted me to carry my cell phone with me wherever I went. As a mother of four children it isn’t easy to lug around a cell phone to every room I am in. So I've been forgetting to carry it with me.

I was outside today for three hours doing yard work with my kids. And, of course, I forgot to bring my phone outside. After trying to get ahold of me for three hours, my husband left work to see if we were okay. When he got home and saw we were fine, he snapped at me.

I walked away and let him calm down before I talked to him about it. I told him I didn’t purposely leave the phone inside the house. I didn’t purposely try to make him worry about us. It was an honest mistake. 

I think this is where a lot of couples struggle in their marriages. They expect something from their spouses, but instead of encouraging them; they demand change. Then, they get mad when they don’t see immediate results.

It may take a few times for me to start remembering to take the phone with me. Yelling at me when I mess up isn’t going to help me remember. It will only discourage me.

When my husband continually points something out to me, I feel pressured to change. If I try to please him and try to change myself, it only leaves me frustrated and pulls me away from him.

My husband knows this. And I know he’s trying to change as well. So I have learned to react calmly when he gets on me about my faults. I try to not take it to heart. I try to remember that God is the One I have to please. If I am pleasing God and trying my best, He will set my husband straight when he’s treating me wrong.

It’s okay to point out each others' weaknesses. We shouldn’t close our eyes to our spouses’ faults. But we can approach our spouses in a loving manner, and pray for God to help them change. Then, we should leave it in God’s hands instead of continually getting mad every time they fall.


God doesn't get mad at us when we fall. He lifts us up and encourages us to continue trying. We need to treat our spouses the same.

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
—1 Thessalonians 5:11

*NOTE: My husband gave me permission to share this message:)

Images by Church Art
4 Comments
Luther Wesley link
10/6/2011 02:02:14 pm

I often forget to call my wife when I am going to be late and that drives her to insanity. It is something that I have to work on while she works on not being so sensitive about me not calling right away.

Reply
Amanda Beth link
10/7/2011 05:16:52 am

I think they just worry about us. That's a good thing! My husband wants to know we are always safe. Thanks for your comment:)

Reply
Simone S Campbell
3/10/2012 01:05:32 am

I love this !!! Really helped me out alot

Reply
Amanda Beth link
3/11/2012 12:17:23 am

Thanks, Simone:) I'm glad it helped you! God bless you:)

Reply



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    Amanda Beth

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    Thanks for stopping by my site! Welcome to my "Enjoying Your Family" blog!

    I'm a wife of 16 years, mother of four children (ages 3 to 11), and author of "YOU CAN HAVE A HAPPY FAMILY - Steps to Enjoying Your Marriage and Children"
                  and
    "THE LOVE WALK: A 15-Week Devotional on 1 Corinthians 13:4-8"

    I also author another blog on spiritual growth every Monday at SharingTruths.com, and I am a weekly guest contributor every Sunday at Christian Blessings.

    God has blessed me, my marriage and my family in more ways than I could ever imagine. I am so honored to give my life to Christ and share His Word wherever God sends me.

    "Blessed is the man who fears the LORD, who finds great delight in his commands. His children will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed."
    Psalm 112:1-2


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    _Click on the tabs below to read excerpts from You Can Have a Happy Family:

    Posted at Gathering Together: Excerpt taken from the chapter "What Men Need."
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    Posted at Living Better at 50+ Magazine: Excerpt on "Forgiving Adultery."

    Posted at God Mission Possible: Post on "Flee From Adultery."









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    The Father's Love: Amid a Frantic Search for His Son, a Father Finds His FaithThe Book of Ruth-A Story of Love and RedemptionMission Possible Spiritual CoveringRoaring Lions, Cracking Rocks, and Other Gems from ProverbsYou Can Have A Happy Family: Steps to Enjoying Your Marriage and ChildrenKaydie

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